Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
