My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
