omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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