this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
