Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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