New low: just hacked my moms facebook
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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