Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Randomize