i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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