yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
