My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
