we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
