hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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