He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
