Your mouth is God's brothel.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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