literally had 100 drinks last night.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
tell your sister to shave her snatch
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
