guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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