you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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