Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize