Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
