i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
