Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I can't turn off my feet"
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize