You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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