alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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