we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
