Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
