**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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