Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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