So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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