For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
