YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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