Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(520): View more from Arizona

Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday

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(520): Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday http://tfl.nu/ewfr

Replies (2) Good night (3206) Bad night (551)
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(317): View more from Indiana

for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.

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(317): for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7. http://tfl.nu/34yz

Replies (13) Good night (783) Bad night (3381)
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(718): View more from New York

I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.

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(718): I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary. http://tfl.nu/e3xl

Replies (155) Good night (8317) Bad night (8659)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight

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(336): I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight http://tfl.nu/7krg

Replies (8) Good night (1060) Bad night (3588)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.

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(615): You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible. http://tfl.nu/1rrn

Replies (16) Good night (3522) Bad night (946)
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(518): View more from New York

it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.

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(518): it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime. http://tfl.nu/6fla

Replies (1) Good night (874) Bad night (1872)
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(805): View more from California

there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you

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(805): there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you http://tfl.nu/cq33

Replies (7) Good night (890) Bad night (2807)
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(613): View more from Ontario

what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?

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(613): what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world? http://tfl.nu/dgrx

Replies (9) Good night (2244) Bad night (1124)
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(907): View more from Alaska

I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.

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(907): I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer. http://tfl.nu/7eiw

Replies (8) Good night (1327) Bad night (620)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.

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(843): He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals. http://tfl.nu/0dw2

Replies (8) Good night (1640) Bad night (881)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.

(732): View more from New Jersey

you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.

(732): View more from New Jersey

IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.

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(732): You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home. (732): you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato. (732): IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME. http://tfl.nu/cjpu

Replies (6) Good night (1450) Bad night (702)
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(406): View more from Montana

Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.

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(406): Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night. http://tfl.nu/g42n

Replies (3) Good night (1153) Bad night (501)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking

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(610): No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking http://tfl.nu/htwk

Replies (5) Good night (468) Bad night (448)
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(360): View more from Washington

I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000

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(360): I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000 http://tfl.nu/u3g9

Replies (3) Good night (545) Bad night (286)
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(513): View more from Ohio

My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.

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(513): My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad. http://tfl.nu/tqeg

Replies (0) Good night (287) Bad night (139)

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