I like to think it a success when the cops are called
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
