Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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