a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
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He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
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also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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