eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
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