Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
The air taste purple.
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