I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
