I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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