The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
