I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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