He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
