ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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