Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
my poor anus
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
