If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
