Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
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