What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
