DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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