I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
