man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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