He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize