There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
How's work?
Spinning.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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