I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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