we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
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Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
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Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize